Their travels brought them closer to Eberdeen by a couple of days. Mesu was surprised that hunting down relics and facing so much danger didn’t pay well. It was no wonder Enya had so many stories, she thought. The group was camped outside of Waman, a small village that Tai remembered from her childhood. It stood along a river and offered a path across to travelers during the day. Nighttime brought an eerie silence.
“Even the tavern is quiet now. I’m sure that Em is experiencing that and will be joining us shortly. There are times that traveling festivals will come through by land or boat. Those who know that there isn’t much to be gained from here, so they stay a day or two. Some of my favorite memories are from those times. It was interesting to meet new people and play the games they had. It was part of the reason why I joined one of them. That life wasn’t as glamorous as I had imagined. This is more fun and exciting.”
Mesu chewed her dried meat as Tai talked to her.
“Is that where you learned to fight?” She took another bite and waited for the answer.
“Aye, it was. One of the acts was a false battle. They taught me a lot of the moves, and I was a performer at one point. I was surprised how much fake fighting taught me about a real fight. I still had to learn how to take a hit and give one. The training and most parts were real. I was a restless youth, and then thought about how I could be using these talents elsewhere. I took a job to escort someone back to their hometown that was part of the festival. That was the last I saw of them.”
“Why leave?” Tai laid back on the ground as Mesu asked. She let out a sigh and stared up at the sky. The smell of rain was in the air, but the clouds were just South of them. It was in the middle of the rainy season, and travel was slower as they tried to find good ground to move along.
“They did good things, but it wasn’t for me. I have so much more to offer. There was a sense of always being the outsider. We had two camps when it came to those who traveled in the group. There was family, and there were the others. I was with the outsiders of the group. We had to watch the things we said and did. You were reminded regularly that you owed them and if you didn’t respect it, they’d exile you or worse. I wasn’t about that life.”
Mesu took in the story and relaxed after having the camp fully set up. Tai had requested they avoid staying in the village, and Zoe had agreed. The dynamics of the group had started making more sense the more time Mesu spent with them. She already felt like she had an equal say in what the group did. It was her goal that kept them moving forward. A side job was picked up here and there, but the end of this would be when they reached Eberdeen, and Mesu got her closure.
Each of them were outsiders or outcasts of some sort, which made it easy to integrate with almost everyone. Mesu looked around as the rest decompressed from their day of travel. Everyone had a hint of focus in their expressions. It was encouraging to Mesu, and she hoped that she was giving off that same look. Her feelings and thoughts on the journey continued to waver. The excitement was there, but it mixed with concern. There were things she never imagined she would do before, such as take a life.
The thought of having the blood on her hands made her wonder if it was worth it. There were those who seemed to enjoy it, and it concerned her. Was it possible that I would be like that one day, she wondered. Zoe and Tai were more indifferent to the issue, it appeared. Mesu looked over at Anna. Their eyes met, and there was something there that they connected on.
“I feel weird for asking, but does the violence ever get easier?” Anna spoke up. Mesu thought it must have been hard on her, also.
There was a silence. The three veterans were all processing the answer. Mesu looked from face to face and watched while they formulated what to say.
“Not for me. It’s between surviving and helping those who are in need. I protect those who are in my charge, and if it comes to violence, then that’s what must happen.” Mesu could not recall the last time she heard Russ talk. The description made perfect sense to Mesu. He had taken more than a handful of hits for the group. She had noticed the scars that were scattered all over his body while they traveled. She often wished he would wear a shirt more.
“I believe the only one of us who may take joy in it is Em. He does take pride in having a body count. We keep that in check as best we can. There hasn’t been a reason to worry that he is doing it excessively. Em isn’t bad, just maybe a bit misunderstood.” Mesu looked around as Zoe spoke. It was clear that they might share the same ideas of their teammate.
“How have you two been with it?”
Mesu looked down as she gathered her thoughts. It was still weird knowing she had ended the life of something that was not a farm animal. Even then, she had only killed chickens, and that was for the purpose of consumption. Her mind went to the prayer her father had taught her. It was fresh in her mind, thinking about how she would thank the Gods for their blessing and promise not let anything go to waste before the act.
What she experienced away from the farm was very different. It was still a fight for survival, but one put up a fight while the other didn’t. She could feel the tears in her eyes. Mesu heard Anna sobbing next to her. She put her arm around Anna like her big brother had many times before. It was odd that she was the one doing the comforting, but it felt good.
“It’s good you both feel that way. Keep it with you. Don’t forget that when you are doing what is necessary.” Tai moved behind the two and put her arms around them. “This is the thing that separates us from the monsters.”
“If you all are going to just sit here and cry tonight, I’m going back to town.” Em sat by the fire with the group. “What you get these three all emotional about, Zoe?”
“Just reminiscing and talking about the past.” Mesu saw Zoe smile at Em as he rolled his eyes.
“Yea, I’m going to bed. Don’t be letting the young ones weeping keep me up.” He got up from the group and started walking to a tent. “I go from a boring town to crying kids. What a way to end the day.”
Mesu could feel her face get red as she wanted to say something back. Any time she had tried to be witty to Em, he had embarrassed her. Zoe shook her head at Mesu as she had witnessed most of them. Mesu hoped for the day she would come out on top.